Wilma and I are in Wales on a damp, foggy day and haven’t ventured out. I’m musing on why a prospective client didn’t take up a coaching programme that she so obviously needed and the conversation turns to general principles of personal development, why limitations and problems sometimes come back after they’ve been addressed and how to see the opportunities for learning and growth in everyday situations.

The water-related challenges at Wilma’s cottage seemed to have come to an end but if you listen to the end of the recording you might think otherwise…

 

 

TED Talk – Brené Brown, ‘Listening to shame’.

I watched this again recently and the part that resonated most is this:

“Shame is the enemy of innovation, creativity and change”

If you’re not one the 65 million people who watched Brené’s earlier TED talk – “The Power of Vulnerability” then it might be a good place to start.

If you have already seen that (and you remember it) then let’s go to “Listening to Shame”.  As Brené points out, shame is something we don’t want to discuss, but it’s something that is a real experience for nearly all of us (apparently if you don’t feel shame it’s an indicator of psychopathy) and it gets in the way of innovation, it gets in the way of creativity and it gets in the way of change.

What do we do about it?

Watch the video for a start…

Happy New Year!  Unless of course, you celebrate according to a different calendar.  I know that all my friends and contacts in Singapore, for example, will be having their main New Year celebrations in a few weeks’ time.

My plans for 2025 include offering some NLP training to anyone who wants to learn how to increase their influence, build personal resilience and learn how to manage their own thinking so that it becomes easier to achieve what you want to achieve in life.

The quote above is one I always include at the start of the programme because some of the results people experience through mastering the principles of NLP can seem ‘like magic’.

Not from Day One, of course, but lots of people are surprised by just how quickly some of the NLP patterns can lead to significant results.   Over the coming weeks I’m planning to share some of my favourite success stories.

If you’re curious enough to want to know more, the first step is the ‘Introduction to NLP’ day in either June or July – depending on what works best for you.

I don’t know whether you write down your goals for the year or just keep them in mind, but I have a question for you:

When you think about your goals for 2025 do you believe you can achieve them?  If not, what’s missing?  Do you need more influence at work?  Do you worry you’ll give up too easily?  Are you unsure that they’re the right goals?

These are the kind of gaps that can be filled through the application of NLP.  Get in touch if you’d like to know some more…

It’s 2025! Wilma and i are discussing New Year’s Resolutions and why we don’t make them but also what we do instead. The conversation takes us through SMART goals, the NLP Well-formed Outcomes pattern and what it means for your goals/outcomes to ‘come from inside’. There’s a little bit about Hawaiian spirituality, a lot about not wanting to seem too weird and a ramble through the value of reading a book more than once.

 

 

In our final episode of the year, we’re comparing notes on how we celebrate Christmas, how we feel about it and how well prepared we are. This episode also includes Wilma talking about the impact of Storm Darragh on the forest around Graig Ddu (The Cottage) and her attempts to reach it in the face of fallen trees.

Happy Christmas!

…and if you’d like the recipe for the Chocolate Christmas Cake, please email dianne@brilliantminds.co.uk

 

It might seem a bit dramatic to say that this innocuous little connector has changed my life, but it’s certainly made a big impact in a specific part of my life.

Let me explain…

When I run a courses I often stay in a hotel and deliver the training in a different hotel or venue.  This involves me transporting my equipment for the day from one place to another at the start of the day.  And bringing it back it back again when I’ve finished for the day.

No problem there, I hear you thinking.

Well, not generally.  I’m quite a low-tech presenter and don’t always use slides, therefore don’t need a laptop.  However,  on occasions when  I’m travelling on the London Undergound and I’m carrying my laptop, course notes, flipchart pens etc etc in a bag that isn’t light (but is secure) the weight can be considerable.  I like my laptop and have no reason to replace it except that it’s quite heavy.

Result:  I find myself grumbling about the weight of stuff I’m carrying around and often end up with aching back or shoulders as a consequence.

Not any more…

I was looking at something on my iPad one day and wondered whether I could use it in place of my laptop when I have a slide presentation.  Hmmm.  No HDMI port and I don’t want to gamble on a venue having wireless connection (although many do)

I did a little research on the internet and I found the above.  It provides me with an HDMI connection to my iPad and also allows me to connect it to power at the same time.

No more lugging the laptop around.  No more aching shoulders.  No more grumbling from me.

Now, I don’t expect you to be inspired by my little connector (I’m guessing you might have known this was possible long before I did), but I would encourage you to think about the places in life where you’re putting up with something that isn’t a massive problem but is a niggling issue.  By giving it some focused thought and taking action, can you change the situation for the better?

Or even change your life….

On the evening that I went to the cinema last week, I was tired, somewhat stressed and – if I’m honest – a bit grumpy.

By the time I was getting in my car to come home all that had changed. ‘Conclave’ is a wonderful film!

Yes, I went to see it because it stars Ralph Fiennes and Stanley Tucci.  Plus it’s set in my favourite city in the world (I’m very keen to make another trip there now).

I was not expecting it to be quite as brilliant as it is…

Magnificent performances form all the lead actors.  Wonderful, intimate photography – lots of close-up shots.  A plot that delivers a few unexpected twists.  And some very thought-provoking messages.

This is what stayed with me…

“…the sin of certainty.  Certainty is the enemy of tolerance…”

I think I’m going to see it again, to relish the experience and possibly retain more of the lovely words.

Wilma and I are in Wales and for once it’s not raining! Join us for a wide-ranging conversation that includes a film review, some musings on religion, the increasing informality of business and life and the AI granny.

 

This week’s inspiration is a pop song.  I heard it on the radio and it’s been in my head for days…

M People’s ‘Search for the Hero‘ is on my playlist of songs with uplifting lyrics.  It’s important to me to play music that has an upbeat message and positive lyrics.  We all know how powerful words can be, so if you’re going to sing the same few lines to yourself over and over and again, they’d better have a positive impact!

Looking for a video to share, I realised that this track was released in the period of my life when I didn’t have a tv, so I’d never seen the official music video.  However, YouTube wasn’t letting me share that one, so this is the best alternative – recorded live at the Euro 96 Extravaganza.  What can say except – I WAS THERE!

Enjoy!

 

I’m back from a business trip to Dubai, Wilma is surrounded by water in Wales. In this episode we’re talking about the need to visit the highest places, Wilma shares another tale from her travels in South America and we discuss the power of Nature in all its glory. Somehow, from there we find ourselves discussing the reason why management has become difficult and debate the label ‘human resources’.

 

Amazingly, there are no reference books this week! But if you’d like to read the article mentioned, it’s here:
https://www.peoplemanagement.co.uk/article/1894065/pressure-why-squeezed-middle-having-hard-time

It was just one slide.  One I’d created at the last minute and slotted into the deck ‘just in case’.  I was surprised then, when all of the delegates mentioned it when we were reviewing the content of the session.  It had, apparently, challenged their thinking, given them new ideas and made them see just how important team meetings can be.

Team meetings.  Part of the cultural fabric of your organisation. A key activity for any manager or leader.  A highlight of the working week. No?

At a time when few managers receive training in how to run a team meeting and not many have good role models they can observe doing it, there is a danger that team meetings become a chore, a bore or they exist no more!

And yet, bringing your team together for a meeting should be an integral part of creating a winning mindset, fostering a sense of belonging and keeping close to what’s going on with your people.

Here are my tips for a successful team meeting…

 

Clear purpose

Before you run any meeting, there should be a clear purpose.  Its even more important for a regular meeting.  Is your team meeting an opportunity for each person to talk about what they’re working on, ask for ideas or help and get some kudos for recent successes?  Is it just about the boss giving essential notices?  Do you have time for non-work-related items?

Ask yourself this question:  how do you know when it’s been a good meeting?  If you find that a difficult question to answer, it might be time to revisit the purpose of the meeting.

 

Regular day and time

My preference is always to hold my team meetings on the same day at the same time.  Put it in your calendar as a recurring meeting and make sure it happens when it’s supposed to.  This signals to your team that the meeting is important.  It maximises the chances that everyone will be there – because they know when it is.

Also, it creates certainty (the C in the SCARF model, remember) and that’s very important. Especially if your organisation is going through some changes or uncertainty, your regular team meeting can be a rock to cling to.

If you’re not sure how often or how long, start with a weekly meeting for 30 minutes.  Do that for 4-6 weeks and review.  Make it longer or shorter, make it more or less frequent after that based on experience.

 

‘Just enough’ time

It’s your team meting so you can decide how long it’s going to be.  I know some leaders who hold daily meetings that last just ten minutes.  I know others who have a weekly two-hour meeting.  The ideal length is just enough time to do everything to fulfil the purpose of the meeting – and no longer.

Part of the reason some people dislike team meetings is that they drag on and seem not to achieve anything.  Yours can be different.

 

Everyone contributes

It’s a team meeting.  Make sure every person in the team contributes.  I often start my meetings by going around the table (or screen) and asking each person the same question.  Often, it’s something like ‘What are your three highlights of the last week/month?’

Part of the art of running a meeting is to spot who’s waiting to speak, to invite input from anyone who’s been particularly quiet and to ensure that the same voices don’t dominate every discussion.

 

Rotate the chair

Sometimes, leaders stop running team meetings because they resent the time it takes to prepare a good meeting.  The simple solution is to rotate the chair.  Let a different person in your team run the meeting each week.  It’s great development for them, it ensures there are lots of fresh ideas and it reduces the pressure on you to make every meeting a success.

Yes, you’ll need to support the person who turn it is this time.  You might need to make time to hear their plans beforehand and to debrief afterwards, but only the first time.  Once everyone gets their confidence, you’ll see a significant change in your workload around team meetings.

 

Include team development activities

As well as using the meeting to handle business, it can be fun occasionally to include some team or personal development activities.  You might need a longer meeting for this, so plan it well in advance and make sure everyone knows.

It could be a guest speaker, or an online training session you can do together.  One leader I know often selects a book, article or TED talk and asks his team to look at it before the meeting.  Then they spend an hour discussing the topic.

You might do some ‘knowledge transfer’ within the team. Ask someone with a specific expertise to run an introductory session for the rest of the team.  Or a masterclass.  Whatever will be of value.

 

Celebrate successes

Everyone loves to feel a part of a winning team.  Celebrate individual and team successes.  I don’t mean organise a party every week, just make sure that successes are acknowledged and that people feel good about what they have achieved.  When the team chalks up a big win, that might be the time to take everyone to lunch.

Small rewards can be as meaningful as big ones.  Never underestimate the power of simply telling someone what they did well.  They know it, but now they know that you know it too.

 

Finally…

If you’ve read this article and you’re thinking it might be time to refresh your team meetings, may I suggest you share the article with your team and discuss with them how you might give your meetings a new lease of life.